Why I Write About Esports
Welcome to my weekly column where I discuss everything esports, predominantly focusing on CS:GO. This space allows me to delve into topics that may not warrant a full feature, covering players, teams, organizations, events, world views, and philosophies.
For the past 1.5 years, I’ve been observing the game as a spectator and writing articles about it for the past 10 months. As a newcomer to the CS:GO scene, I want to start by explaining the core reason behind my writing.
It all comes down to my obsessions. Originally, I was a SC2 writer, but that wasn’t planned. I only started writing about SC2 because a friend who casually watched the game suggested it. He believed that my explanations of strategy, context, and player stories were more in-depth than what broadcasters provided. So I began writing for SC2 and Team Liquid after seeing a post from Kwanghee “Waxangel” Woo, expressing his need for volunteer writers in the Live Report thread.
At the same time, another Team Liquid writer, Tyler “Fionn” Erzberger, was determined to make writing his career. After countless hours of volunteer work for SC2 and later LoL, he was hired by Riot, then eScore, and eventually ESPN.
Back then and even now, the SC2 industry couldn’t provide monetary compensation for my writing. I had to ask myself the same question Fionn faced. Was I willing to write without any form of payment? For Fionn, the answer was a definite no because he wanted to turn it into a career. Initially, my answer was also no. I had planned to quit once I got tired or bored or maybe switch to another game like Fionn did. However, there was always another captivating story waiting to be told, and I was the only one who could tell it.
During Blizzcon 2013, the organizers split the games into two streams due to time constraints. The problem was that not everyone at the venue could see the secondary stream, and most viewers at home only watched the main stream. The entire weekend, the narrative revolved around Lee Jaedong’s journey to the finals after a year of second-place finishes. While it was an engaging story, I believed the rise of Kim “sOs” Yoo Jin and the fall of Kim “duckdeok” Kyeong Deok were the two best stories of that Blizzcon.
You can read both articles here:
Woongjin_sOs and the Greatest Story Never Told
Duckdeok and the Greatest Story Never Told
To summarize, Blizzcon marked sOs’ entrance into the public consciousness. He dominated the competition and proved himself to be a skilled and clutch player. Throughout his career, he would continue to demonstrate this ability repeatedly. On the other hand, duckdeok’s story reached its end. He became the face of anonymous Koreans and faced numerous struggles throughout his life as a pro gamer, from the Werra scandal to a lack of salary. Despite this, he managed to win WCS EU after funding his own way to compete.
Finally making it to Blizzcon, duckdeok pulled off a remarkable upset against Lee “INnoVation” Shin Hyun. Unfortunately, he was relegated to the secondary stream, depriving him of the glory he desperately desired. Disheartened, he ultimately retired.
Stories like these constantly occupy my mind, always bubbling beneath the surface. It is this drive that compelled me to continue writing about SC2, despite knowing that I may never receive payment. I would rather go uncompensated than allow these untold stories to fade away. If I can make just one person understand and feel what I experience, then it is all worthwhile.
This is the game that got me hooked
I started following CS:GO towards the end of 2014 and developed a deep appreciation for the game. Its balance of time, economy, tactics, team play, and iterative rounds intrigued me. Initially, I only watched as a spectator with no intention of writing about it.
The thrilling matches (such as the NiP vs Fnatic game at MLG Aspen), the hilarious and insightful analyst desk, and watching less skilled teams like LG strategize against stronger opponents captivated me. However, it was Fnatic’s run at ESL ONE Cologne in 2015 that compelled me to write. Their ability to pull off miracle pauses against VP and EnVyUs, while dealing with immense pressure from the crowd cheering for their defeat, left a lasting impression. It was a monumental achievement of willpower and composure.
Although I felt hesitant to write about CS:GO due to my limited tactical and historical knowledge of the game, the story of Fnatic at ESL ONE Cologne persisted in my mind. It became like a catchy song that I couldn’t get rid of. Eventually, I caved and decided to put it up on Goldper10 (now GAMURS) to free my mind from its grasp.
You can read the article here: In Three Minutes: Fnatic at ESL ONE Cologne 2015
Obsession is the driving force behind my writing. If a story grabs hold of my mind, I feel compelled to share it. Every time I think I’m done, a new story emerges that I must tell. As I dive deeper into studying and watching competitions, I often think of two quotes. One from Daigo Umehara: “I play because playing is the best expression of myself.” And the other from Miyamoto Musashi: “The Way of the warrior does not include other Ways…But even though these are not part of the Way, if you know the Way broadly, you will see it in everything.”
Competition encompasses self-expression and self-realization. The more I learn, the more I realize how much I still don’t know, and the more I yearn for knowledge. The strategy, tactics, team play, leadership, roles, and narrative are all interconnected in esports and especially in CS:GO. This is what makes them so fascinating to me.
That’s the kind of writer I am – one with peculiar obsessions who hopes to inspire the same passion in others. I want people to see and feel what I experience when watching a match. I want them to be able to revisit my old articles years from now and relive the excitement and emotions of those moments, whether it’s duckdeok’s struggle or Fnatic’s miraculous pauses.